carrefour

a crossroads

What do you do when you are asked to do something that makes you sick to your stomach? I was raised that when you are asked to do something…. you say yes (within reason of course!) Especially when asked to do something at church…. So let me give you some background information:

* I hardly say “no!”
* My job does indeed involve being in front of groups BUT they are small groups. No matter what age or level of memory, I HATE BEING IN FRONT OF GROUPS OF PEOPLE! It makes me sick to my stomach.
* I do not like doing things that I think I may fail doing. Why do you think I hardly EVER sew?
*If I say no, I really mean it, but…
*I am easily guilted into things when I say no…

So, this being said, I was asked to do a calling at work and I feel sick to my stomach about it. It is WAY beyond my level of comfort and I cried at the thought of it (well, after I got home!) My first thought was… MY MOM IS GOING TO BE SO DISAPPOINTED IF I SAY NO! So I called her…. and I think she kind of laughed and then said she wouldn’t blame me for saying no…. I am at a carrefour in my little life. Say no or do it…. Do something I know for a fact I can not do…. Kind of an easy decision but it is emotionally draining me and making me sick to my stomach. I am 90% sure what I need to do but I sometimes just wish someone would make the choice for me…